Double And Trouble….

That’s what I’ve started calling them. Not sure who is Double and who is Trouble, but they kind of go together and so it’s a group name.
Honestly though, I have a whole new respect for moms of twins. Especially toddler age twins. And while Paxton and Coppélia are not technically twins, they are 10 weeks apart in age, they function like a unit. Or more like a unit that is going in 15 different directions all at once while simultaneously exploding and causing mayhem in a 12 mile radius all around themselves. And while I’m sure moms of infant twins have their hands full…at least infants are somewhat stationary and only move if you move them. No disrespect to mom’s of infants but moms’ of toddlers, I tip my hat to you. 
Clint and I knew adding 2 children to the mix would result in having to plan more time in regards to getting ready to get out the door, and pretty much to doing everything…..but it is not a linear amount of time that it takes…it is exponential. We only had Paxton pre-Coppélia for a couple of weeks and he definitely added time but it didn’t seem like that much at all, change a diaper, throw on some clothes, grab wipes and diapers and we were out the door….Now though, I’m seriously considering becoming an octopus. I really could use the extra 3 sets of arms/hands. But I’d need to be an octopus that can simultaneously crawl, fly, run, jump, and have an extra 3 sets of eyes and extra sharp hearing. And that’s just so I can get through a meal….

For example….this is something that should take about 30 seconds-1 minute. The task at hand…wipe child’s face down from lunch, bring lunch plates inside, change diaper, and go outside and play. Simple and easy enough right?

Here’s how it went for me this afternoon- go to wipe first child down from lunch only to discover that the peanut-butter/jelly wrap we had, he had chosen to turn inside out and so there is jelly everywhere except in his stomach. Part way through wiping child 1 down, child 2 sneaks out of her seat and decides to go down the porch stairs but somehow (I still can’t figure out how) gets herself caught between two of the steps with her legs dangling between the stairs and her top half across the stair. Luckily my 5 year old alerted me to this as I was still trying to sort through jelly mess “Mommy, Coppélia is stuck in the stairs”. So I go and rescue child 2 and promptly forget that child 1 is still partially covered in jelly. In the midst of this, thanks to my nose, discover that someone has filled their pants. Set both children inside the house, and grab the plates from lunch to take inside.

After balancing the plates in one hand and putting child 1 back inside for the 3rd time while attempting to shut the door and not smash child 2s hands in the door. Make it inside and quickly run over to the sink to rinse the plates off. Quickly come back to find that child 2 has up-rooted one of the house plants which she has in one hand and is licking the dirt off her other hand (which still had some jelly on it). Child 1 is happily tossing dirt up in the air. I quickly replant the plant after scolding “no no no”, to which then child 1 walks around dragging the dirt further into the house quietly stating “no no no”. I sweep up the dirt on the group which child 2 is still trying to eat and lick up and tuck both kids under my arms to head up for a diaper change. 

I start with child 2 because she is always dirty or wet and somehow miracle of miracle she is clean and dry, but this means that I have to re-wrestle her to get her clothes and shoes back on. While I’m wrestling her, child 1 has found child 2’s pacifier and is happily sucking on it. This causes child 2 to scream/screech. I rescue the paci, tell child 2 it is only for nap/bedtime and put it up and away. Meanwhile child 2 has found her bag of pony-tail holders that I thought was closed which it obviously wasn’t because she is tossing them around the room. Child 1 finds this hilarious. I then discover that it is his diaper that is causing the foul smell that I’ve been smelling. I get his diaper changed and all the pony-tail holders picked up and head to the bathroom to dump the diaper. Both kiddos wander after me towards the bathroom.

I walk out of the bathroom (to dump the diaper took all of 10 seconds), and child 1 is on top of his older brother’s bunk bed ladder jumping on the bed. On the way up the ladder he wiped off the rest of the jelly from his hands. As I climb the stairs to get him, child 2 is in the bathroom just about to fall off the step stool while trying to eat the toothpaste. I somehow manage to get them both out of the room, closing the doors behind me as I go.

Somehow we make it back downstairs and to the door to head out to play. And this is they way with everything. And ultimately I just laugh. It’s the only way. Here are a few photos of the two of them….but not actually together because that is near impossible to get the two of them together in a photo.