This Time Next Week…
This time next week for the first time I will help three little boys take baths and get ready for bed and read books and say prayers for three little ones for the very first time.
I’m just going to kind of let that sink in.
It will be 21 months to the day that we signed paper work stating that we were going to be Edric’s mommy and daddy and that night we will tuck him in to his own bed in our house for the first time. After 21 months of waiting for updates each month, of prayers, and of more tears then I care to count, he will be sleeping under our roof.
The 7 days between here and then are still a mountain to climb….I’ve got two more shifts to work Thursday and Friday and anyone can tell you a day in the ER is no walk in the park. And then we have 18+ hours of travel Saturday into Sunday. And then Monday is custody and visa. And while we are super excited to take custody we are very aware that it will likely be the hardest day of Edric’s life. He was just days old when birth mom signed papers relinquishing him, but he has been in Foster Mom’s arms and house since he was a little over 3 months old, and on Monday he will say goodbye and he will lose the only home and family he has ever known. We all know he’s coming home to his forever family for good, but he doesn’t know that or even understand what that means. And I’m pretty sure my broken “It’s ok” and “I love you” in Korean won’t make a lick of sense. And so we will be starting at square one teaching him and showing him our love and care for him so that he can begin to attach to us and begin to see us as family and one day love us in return. Tuesday is going to be a buffer day. No real plans, we know of a park nearby where we are staying and are just leaving everything kind of open. And then Wednesday morning we will start the long 18 hour plane ride home. And it’s hard enough being 34 riding on a plane that long….not sure what it’s going to be like as a 2 year old that is grieving. And then we will arrive home. We’re inviting all who want to join us at the airport at arrival. And after that we are going to retreat and hide from all as we figure out how to become a family of 5 and learn that attachment for all of us.
And so while there is a mountain yet to climb, and I can only imagine the emotions and experiences that this next week will bring, in a week, there will be three little boys tucked in bed in the bedroom upstairs. (and very likely with me snuggled in on the cot in their room making sure all is well).
So let’s start the climb.