Stepping Out…

I’m not one to usually put myself out there and try something that I’ve never done. I like things safe and secure and I’m quite the introvert. However about a month or so ago, (probably longer at this point because things have been crazy and I’m finally sitting down to write this) I was making the boys mac and cheese for lunch and happened to check facebook. One of the first things I saw was a link from Jen Hatmaker about applying to be on her new book launch team. I’ve read a few of her books and really enjoyed them. She’s adopted two children and we both attended OBU (at different times though) and so I’ve really connected with her writings. On top of it all she’s hilarious.

So I saw the link and thought about it for few seconds and then set my phone down and said “yeah, like I’d ever get chosen…not even going to try”. And went back to making mac and cheese and cutting up mango for lunch.

But a few minutes passed and it kept gnawing at me. And so I threw my doubts aside and thought, “what the heck”, and so while the macaroni boiled over on the stove I quickly filled out the application. I didn’t reflect much on it.

A week or so later I got an email, and I thought “here’s the rejection letter”. And so I started to read it and it said something along the lines of “we had over 5,000 people apply but could only accept 500 of them” at which point I stopped reading and said to my self “and the rest of it will say, thanks but no thanks”.

Surprise of all surprises it actually did not say that. It actually said that I had been chosen to be one of the 500 and I would receive an early electronic and paper copy of the book. I was to read it and then write an endorsement. I was kind of shocked.

After the shock wore off the doubt crept in and took over. I remember telling my husband, “clearly they chose the wrong person, it’s not like I can even do a good job”, and that was the milder form of doubt that plagued me for a number of days. I felt like I was totally undeserving and out of my league and that there was someone way better than me to do this.

Despite the doubt and feelings creeping in I decided to start reading. It only took to page 7 until I was kind of knocked off me feet (ie-Did Jen know the thoughts running through my head while I read her book, because she clearly wrote some of it directly to me…). The whole first section is on learning to love yourself…something I am so not good at…AT ALL.

And then on page 28 an entire chapter started on “Running Your Race”. I could probably quote the whole chapter, but parts of page 31 read as follows….

“Stop minimizing what you are good at and thrown yourself into it with no apologies. Do you know who will do this for you? No one. You are it. Don’t bury that talent, because the only thing fears yields is one dormant gift in a shallow grave….You are good at something for a reason. God designed you this way, on purpose. It isn’t fake or a fluke or small. These are the mind and heart and hands and voice you’ve been given, so use them.”

And so I will…and in the meantime I encourage everyone to plan some time in August (when the book officially comes out) to put your feet up and dive into a GOOD book…(I’m already reading through it a second time and loving it more and learning more and of course laughing a ton)

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